The word ‘rebound’ means, “to bounce back after hitting something hard,” or “recover in value, amount, or strength after a decrease or decline.”
But, when it comes to relationships, a rebound means being someone new after a relationship has come to end, in order to avert the ache of a broken heart.
A rebound is meant to be fun, spontaneous, and a non-taxing refuelling. But, often, it doesn’t work like that. In the aftermath of a break-up, we are vulnerable. The loss of a relationship makes our minds fuzzy, and no matter how much we’d like to tell ourselves otherwise, we can’t think straight. When we jump into something new before we’ve processed our feelings about the ex, and the end of what we had with them, we might misconstrue things. This is how sometimes we realise that a relationship is a rebound when it’s a bit too late.
Of course, there is no fixed amount of time that one needs to give to healing from a relationship. Sometimes, emotions die long before the official tag of “ex” is given to someone. For some people, it may take a week, and for others, years. Unlike what Charlotte says in Sex And The City, you don’t always need twice as long as the length of the relationship to get over someone. You might need less, you might need more. But it’s not until it’s all done and dusted… physically, emotionally, and spiritually… that you’re ready for a new relationship. Anything before that is a hotbed for complications. If there’s anything you don’t need in the wake of a break-up, it is yet another painful, exhausting heartbreak. So, unless you’re sure that bringing another person into your life will not bring more drama, you might want to steer clear.
At this point, it is important to take a moment to consider what it truly means to be “over” someone. It doesn’t mean that you stop caring about them.Neither does it mean that you don’t miss the time you had with them. Nor does it mean that their presence, or absence has no affect on you. It simply means that you recognise that, for whatever reason, the relationship was not meant for you, and you don’t want to rekindle the fire. With a soft corner in your heart reserved for them forever, you have renegotiated the dynamics of your relationship with them, and no longer desire for things to go back to what they once were. It is only when you reach this point of no confusion, and no return, that you are ready for the fun, spontaneous, non-taxing refuelling that a rebound is supposed to bring into your life.
So, to rebound, or not to rebound…?